Friends. Raise your hand if you’re ready to turn your sex life up to eleven. Yes? Then let’s get you on Team Lube. You might be thinking to yourself, “But lube is for people experiencing menopause and/or ready for anal sex.” Ok, that’s true, but the real truth is this: lube is for everyone who’s of age and ready to have fantastic, mind-blowing sex. And if all that stands between you and a seriously fun roll in the hay is some gently-warmed, germ-free and super-slippery lube, well…let’s talk. Behold: here are the top 5 myths out there about lube — and why none of them hold water.
1. Lube is only for post-menopausal women
Ah, the “change.” And what they mean by change is: menopause likes to interrupt a woman’s sex life, with hormonal changes that physically manifest in vaginal dryness, painful sex, and banishing her libido to hide out in a cave somewhere, refusing to come out. Our founder Amy created Pulse after she experienced menopause for herself, and realized that personal lubricants out there left quite a bit to be desired. So she created two different plush, thick formulas that were slick and sexy — and a touchless warming dispenser to go along with it.
Let’s all take a moment of silence to honor Amy’s bravery and strong lube leadership.
<thirty seconds of silence>
But! Lube isn’t just for menopause. It’s for anyone that wants to enhance their self-made lubrication. In fact, according to a 2015 Indiana University study, 70 percent of the 2,453 women surveyed said that lube made sex more pleasurable and enjoyable.
This makes sense — after all, the more slippery everything is, the more aroused you’ll feel. Even when everything down there is running like a well-oiled machine. And if you’re talking about anal sex, well, we’ll be blunt: you need lube. Bottom line. (Yes, that is an anal sex joke.)
2. Cold lube is fine …
Well, sure. That is, if you want to feel like your extremely sensitive tissues are tensing up (see also: “Shrinkage,” Seinfeld, Season 5, episode 21) — because sexual arousal is essentially about engorging your privates with blood. It’s called getting hot and heavy for a reason, right?
So, let’s say, in the midst of a moment, you hit up your genitals with some cool — or God forbid, cold — lube. That’s going to be a bit of a shock to the system. Capillaries temporarily shrink, blood flow slows, and psychologically, you’re interrupted. And let’s be honest: cold lube equals visions of speculums dancing in your head. In other words, clinical, and the opposite of your happy place. That’ll kill any mood faster than you can say “gynecologist.”
3. …or I can just warm it between my fingers! It’s fine!
That works. If you want slippery, well-lubricated fingers and palms. Warming it up by rubbing it quickly between palms or fingers will simply break down the lube, and your hands will absorb the product. Sounds messy. And not economical.
4. It’s embarrassing to admit that you want to bring lube into the mix.
Ok…we get that it might feel strange. After all, our society has been conditioned to think self-lubrication is the sole indicator that a woman is sexually excited. But Pulse is here to normalize the use of lube. Functionally, lube is essential — a woman could be experiencing vaginal dryness because of several things: illness, menopause, medication, breastfeeding, or just a natural dip in libido. These are all NORMAL things in a woman’s life — and no reason to press the sex-life pause button. And, let’s refer back to number one in this article: lube is great no matter where you are on the vaginal dryness spectrum. Think of it like a bedroom cheerleader.
But. Still. It might feel awkward to be all, “Honey, I‘d like to start using lube … tonight,” and then present a Pulse Pod. We have news for you: the awkwardness is just in your head! Because honestly? That statement is awesome, because what you really just said was, “I want to have great sex tonight!” And who doesn’t want to hear that? No one, that’s who. Anyway, to help you out, we’ll refer you to an earlier blog post, with a list of lube conversation starters. (And psst — having a Pulse Touchless Warming Dispenser on your side table will also be a conversation starter.)
5. It doesn’t matter where I keep my lube.
We’d like to argue the counterpoint here: it does matter — especially now, in this Age of Covid-19. Lube goes on some of the most sensitive skin in your body: mucous membranes, which are thinner and more delicate. And what you put down there not only has to have the safest ingredients, but also needs to be free of bacteria and mold.
Quick quiz: Where do you keep your lube? Is it in your bedside stand? Is the top still on it? If so, is it crusty around the edges?
These are all ways that contamination can creep into your lube — germs love warm, wet dark areas. That’s why it’s essential that the Pulse Touchless Warming Dispenser is a closed system. The lube is warmed within the Pulse Pod, which also uses airless pump technology — and then of course, Pulse dispenses the lube touchlessly and automatically. The formulation’s integrity is never compromised.
Yes, this makes lube sound like top secret FBI information, but to be honest, we take the safety of your lube — and your comfort, and your level of convenience — seriously. We worry about it, so you don’t have to. All you have to do? Just swipe your hand, get your serving of lube, and go and have some fun.